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It occured to me whilst walking home today just how scared I am of dark streets whilst walking alone.
I HOPE I'm rarely considered sexist, but I think the blind pannic footsteps behind you even in the middle of the day is generally only felt by women.
Few men I know could understand the absolute terror that fills my heart simply walking to and from my boyfriends house at night / in the morning. My heart thuds stupidly loudly if I hear someone just behind me. No matter how inocent the situation is, if someone suddenly appears in close proximity in front of / behind you and that someone specifically is male, I can't help but shudder and be suspicious.
This said, if its very quiet, and no-ones around, I'm fine. Especially if I've far better things occupying my worried little head.
I truly, honestly don't think the R word is something I personally could ever recover from. I'd rather be murdered. That may sound very strange to some of you, but it's the truth. I'd live for a very long time as a victim, trapped by the actions of a random stranger / despised former ascociate.
I pannic because I occupy the front downstairs room - the idea of being burgled THEN attacked and abused is even worse. An unlikely possibility, true. But mine is the most accessible room of the house. When its quiet late at night, and raining, the drops sound like someone outside. A stray cat miaowing sounds like someone crying for help in the local park. And I'm terrified.
So, for you men who've read this far, please remember if you're walking down a lonely street at night, and there's a woman there also (who should really be in a taxi and you know it) please be very aware that she's probably noticed you, is too scared to turn around and find out who's there, and really really wishes you'd slow down as she speeds up.
*nervous*
Em x
I HOPE I'm rarely considered sexist, but I think the blind pannic footsteps behind you even in the middle of the day is generally only felt by women.
Few men I know could understand the absolute terror that fills my heart simply walking to and from my boyfriends house at night / in the morning. My heart thuds stupidly loudly if I hear someone just behind me. No matter how inocent the situation is, if someone suddenly appears in close proximity in front of / behind you and that someone specifically is male, I can't help but shudder and be suspicious.
This said, if its very quiet, and no-ones around, I'm fine. Especially if I've far better things occupying my worried little head.
I truly, honestly don't think the R word is something I personally could ever recover from. I'd rather be murdered. That may sound very strange to some of you, but it's the truth. I'd live for a very long time as a victim, trapped by the actions of a random stranger / despised former ascociate.
I pannic because I occupy the front downstairs room - the idea of being burgled THEN attacked and abused is even worse. An unlikely possibility, true. But mine is the most accessible room of the house. When its quiet late at night, and raining, the drops sound like someone outside. A stray cat miaowing sounds like someone crying for help in the local park. And I'm terrified.
So, for you men who've read this far, please remember if you're walking down a lonely street at night, and there's a woman there also (who should really be in a taxi and you know it) please be very aware that she's probably noticed you, is too scared to turn around and find out who's there, and really really wishes you'd slow down as she speeds up.
*nervous*
Em x
